Donald Trump’s name is now affixed to one of Washington’s most prominent cultural landmarks.
Last week, the board of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts voted to add Trump’s name to the building, quickly installing new signage and igniting a national debate over presidential legacy, cultural institutions, and political symbolism.
If naming things is the goal, however, there is a far more consequential place for Trump’s name than a theater marquee: the Washington, D.C., Metro system.
Here’s the proposal — part satire, part serious public policy.
Federalize Metro. Give it a permanent, dedicated funding source. End the endless regional fights over who pays more and who benefits most. And if branding truly matters, rename it the “Trump Train.”
The name would be vintage Trump. During his campaigns, supporters often said they were “riding the Trump Train,” a phrase synonymous with momentum and loyalty. Turning that slogan into a literal transit system — one that actually runs reliably — would be ironic, memorable, and unmistakably on brand.
But the humor works only because the problem is real.
Metro is the transportation backbone of the nation’s capital, yet it operates without the stability expected of a system serving the federal government. Unlike most major transit systems, Metro has no dedicated funding source. Instead, it relies on annual contributions from Washington, D.C., Maryland, and Virginia, along with fares and intermittent federal support. Every few years, the system approaches another fiscal cliff, triggering warnings about service cuts, fare hikes, or deferred maintenance.
If Trump wants a legacy that lasts longer than signage, federalizing Metro would do far more than renaming another building. The system moves federal workers, military personnel, contractors, tourists, and residents from across the region whose livelihoods are directly tied to Washington. Treating Metro as a national asset — rather than a perpetual regional negotiation — would reflect reality.
The timing matters.
Across the region, leaders are backing proposals that would require hundreds of millions of dollars in new annual funding to stabilize Metro. Each jurisdiction must determine how to raise its share, often pointing toward taxes, fees, or other local revenue sources. Recent reporting makes clear that residents may soon be asked to pay more to sustain the system .
That includes jurisdictions without Metro stations, such as Prince William and Stafford counties, which already contribute based on the understanding that their residents use the system for commuting, employment, and regional travel. This structure — paying in without hosting stations — is not new, but rising funding demands are intensifying long-standing frustration.
Meanwhile, jurisdictions with dense station coverage argue they shoulder disproportionate costs. The result is a familiar cycle: everyone claims to overpay, no one feels treated fairly, and Metro remains financially fragile.
The Kennedy Center renaming underscores the contrast. Names can be added quickly. Plaques can be installed overnight. But none of that fixes the structural challenges facing the region’s most essential piece of infrastructure.
A federally funded Metro with a dedicated revenue stream would end the recurring brinkmanship. It would allow long-term planning, predictable investment, and fewer surprise demands on local governments and taxpayers. It would also align Metro’s governance with its true role: serving the capital of the United States.
If Trump wants his name on Washington in a way that actually affects daily life — and earns reluctant respect even from critics — this is the opportunity.
Put the name underground. Make it move. And finally fix the system everyone depends on, whether they live next to a station or help fund it from miles away.
