Mom on the Run
Ahhh. I’ve got a few minutes, and I take the opportunity to sit on the couch for a minute. The TV’s not on, but I don’t have time for that anyway. I just want to sit.
And as I sit, I look down at the coffee table; something bright orange has caught my eye. I lean forward, and … darn it! Another scratch-off lottery ticket!
My son, my youngest, turned 18 about a month ago, and the first thing he wanted to do was buy a lottery ticket. He told his father and me about it in advance: “On my birthday. The day I turn 18. I hope they card me!”
I had asked, of course. “You know lottery tickets are a complete waste of money,” I had chided. “The odds are ridiculous. That’s why they’re called a tax on stupid people.” My son had looked at me blankly. “Because only stupid people buy them, so the money is a tax ….”
“I know that,” he had pshawed right back at me. “I know I’m going to lose the money. But I don’t care! I’m 18! I can buy them now! I just want to be carded.” OK, ha ha, I got it, 18 is a big deal but there’s not much tangible about it, so buying a lottery ticket specifically to get carded … that was pretty funny.
The night of his birthday, I remembered, and asked: “Hey, did you buy your lottery ticket?” He nodded. “Did they card you?”
“No,” he said, sounding disgusted. “I can’t believe it.”
“Well, you are tall,” I had soothed. “So you had the experience, anyway. Finally lost some money on a lottery ticket.”
“Ha, no!” my son had said, grinning. “I won! Ten bucks! On a five-dollar ticket!”
“You’re kidding!” I was frankly floored. I’ve bought probably a dozen lottery tickets over as many years, and lost just about every time. “OK, well, that’s not normal, you know.”
“Yeah, I know,” he had said. “But I won ten bucks, so I’ll get another one. I’ll get them until I stop winning, anyway.”
And I figured that was that. He’d get another ticket, and lose that $5, and be done with it.
Or not. In the past four weeks, my son has won the lottery three times. First he won the $10, then he won $50, and then he won $5. Every time he gets a ticket, he wins. He’s 100%. Every time, I tell him, “Don’t think this happens normally. The lottery is a profit-making venture, so they have to take in more than they give out.” And every time, “Yeah, yeah, I know,” he tells me, waving his hand in irritation.
So. Another lottery ticket. On the coffee table. Is this finally the one that teaches my kid about gambling, and wasting hard-earned money, and odds? Let’s see. “10X the money,” it says across the top. “Match any of your numbers to any of the winning numbers; win prize shown for that number.” OK, that seems simple enough. And my son has scratched off a bunch of rows of numbers.
The winning numbers are across the top: 34, 06, 36, 31. So they need to match up. I start scanning. The first line: 01, 02, 33, 25, 32. Well, of course, not a winner. The second line: 13, 06 … wait, 06? I look, and no way! My son won, again! I peer down at the little gray numbers: $5.00. And in the upper-left hand corner, the price tag for the scratch-off ticket” $5.
I do the math. For four tickets, my son has spent $20. With that $20, he has won $70. Not, darn it, the lesson I was hoping he would learn! Unbelievable! Though … well … maybe I should give Mr. Lucky five bucks of my own for the next time he goes ….
